Tuesday, October 28, 2003

Children's Science Exam Answers
These are real answers given by children.

Q: Name the four seasons.
A: Salt, pepper, mustard and vineger.

Q: Explain one process by which water an be made safe to drink.
A: Flirtation makes the water safe to drink because it removes large pollutants, like grit, sand, dead sheep and canoeists.

Q: How is dew formed?
A: The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire.

Q:How can you delay milk turning sour?
A: Keep it in the cow.

Q: What causes the tides in the oceans?
A: The tides are a fight between the Earth and the Moon. All water tends to flow towards the moon, because there is no water on the moon and nature hates
a vacum. I forgot where the sun joins in this fight.

Q: What are steroids?
A: Thigs to keeping carpets still on the stairs.

Q: What happens to your body as you age?
A: When you get old, so do your bowels and you get intercontinental.

Q: What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty?
A: He says good-bye to his boyhood and looks forward to his adultery.

Q: Name a disease associated with cigarettes.
A: Premature death.

Q: What is artificial insemination?
A: When the farmer does it to the bull instead of the cow.

Q: How are the main parts of the body categorized? (e.g., adbomen).
A: The body is consisted into 3 parts- the brainium, the borax and the adbominal cavity. The brainium contains the brain, The borax contains the heart and lungs, and the abdomnial cavity contains the five vowels, A.E.I.O. and U.

Q: What is the fibula?
A: A small lie.

Q: What does "varicose" mean?
A: Nearby.

Q: Give the meaning of the term "Caesarean Section".
A: The Caesarean Section is a district in Rome.

Q:What does the word "benign" mean?
A: Benign is what you will be after you be eight.

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