You know that you drink too much coffee when...

Last week I stopped at Starbucks on my way to work for my usual non-fat vanilla latte. After placing my order at the drive thru I pulled forward and waited in line behind several other cars. As I reached for my purse I discovered that I had forgotten it at home. As I pulled up to the window I explained to the young woman that I had forgotten my purse. She simply smiled and said, just pay us tomorrow morning when you come through. Wow, maybe I do drink too much coffee.

You Know You're Drinking Too Much Coffee When ...

* You answer the door before people knock.
* You ski uphill.
* You get a speeding ticket even when you're parked.
* You speed walk in your sleep.
* You haven't blinked since the last lunar eclipse.
* You just completed another sweater and you don't know how to knit.
* You grind your coffee beans in your mouth.
* You sleep with your eyes open.
* You have to watch videos in fast forward.
* You can take a picture of yourself from ten feet away without using the timer.
* You lick your coffeepot clean.
* Your eyes stay open when you sneeze.
* You don't sweat, you percolate.
* You walk twenty miles on your treadmill before you realize it's not plugged in.
* Charles Manson thinks you need to calm down.
* People get dizzy just watching you.
* The Taster's Choice couple wants to adopt you.
* You're so wired, you pick up AM radio.
* People can test their batteries in your ears.
* Instant coffee takes too long.
* When someone says. "How are you?", you say, "Good to the last drop."
* You want to be cremated just so you can spend the rest of eternity in a coffee can.
* Your birthday is a national holiday in Brazil.
* You go to sleep just so you can wake up and smell the coffee.
* You name your cats "Cream" and "Sugar."
* You can outlast the Energizer bunny.
* You short out motion detectors.
* Your nervous twitch registers on the Richter scale.
* You don't tan, you roast.
* You don't get mad, you get steamed.
* You help your dog chase its tail.
* You introduce your spouse as your coffee mate.
* Your first aid kit contains two pints of coffee with an I.V. hookup.

And my favorite...
* You're the employee of the month at the local coffeehouse and you don't even work there.