Sunday, December 21, 2003

1. Only in America ... can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.

2. Only in America ... are there handicap parking places in front of a skating rink.

3. Only in America ... do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.

4. Only in America ... do people order double cheese burgers, large fries, and a diet coke.

5. Only in America ... do banks leave safe doors open and then chain the pens to the counters.

6. Only in America ... do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.

7. Only in America ... do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place.

8. Only in America...do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight.

9. Only in America ... do we use the word "politics" to describe the process so well: "Poli" in Latin meaning "many" and "tics" meaning "bloodsucking creatures."

10. Only in America ... do they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille lettering.

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Friday, December 05, 2003

Girlfriends...

I sat on the porch overlooking a beautiful mountain lake on a summer day, enjoying a glass of wine with my Mom. Older than me, mother of four, experienced and wise.

"Get yourself some girlfriends," she advised, swirling the wine in her glass. "You are going to need girlfriends. Go places with them, do things with them."

What a funny piece of advice, I thought. Hadn't I just gotten married? Hadn't I just joined the couple-world? I was a married woman, for goodness sake, not a young girl who needed girlfriends.

Nevertheless, I listened to my Mom and I got back in touch with my
old girlfriends of years long gone.

As the years tumbled by, one after another, gradually I came to
understand that Mom knew what she was talking about. Here is what I
know about them:

Girlfriends bring casseroles and scrub your bathroom when you are
sick. Girlfriends! keep your children and keep your secrets.
Girlfriends give advice when you ask for it. Sometimes you take
it, sometimes you don't.

Girlfriends don't always tell you that you're right, but they're
usually honest. Girlfriends still love you, even when they don't
agree with your choices.

Girlfriends might send you a birthday card, but they might not. It
does not matter in the least.

Girlfriends laugh with you, and you don't need canned jokes to
start the laughter.

Girlfriends pull you out of jams.

Girlfriends don! 't keep a calendar that lets them know who hosted
the other last

Girlfriends will give a party for your son or daughter when they
get married or have a baby in whichever order that comes!

Moreover, girlfriends are there for you, in an instant and truly,
when the hard times come.

Girlfriends listen when you lose a job or a husband.
Girlfriends listen when your children break your heart.
Girlfriends listen when your parent's minds and bodies fail.

My girlfriends bless my life.

Once we were young, with no idea of the incredible joys or the
incredible sorrows that lay ahead.

Nor did we know how much we would need each other.

Share this with your girlfriends (that includes sisters) and even to women you are not quite friends with. You never know, someday they may end up being a dear old friend. Let them know how much you appreciate them.

I'm sharing this with you because I appreciate you more than I could ever express.

"There are many things in life that will catch your eye, but only a few will catch your heart . . . pursue those."

~ Author Unknown

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